I like western movies. I would blame it on living in a house full of men for so long, but I think it goes back beyond that. My dad loved the old Clint Eastwood
spaghetti westerns. We would all pile in the car and go to the drive-in. We were so young that after the cartoons, we would fall asleep. In those days, cars were big enough to live in. My sister and I would sleep in the back, and my baby brother would lay in Mom's lap. Once we were all down and quiet, Dad was left to enjoy Fist Full of Dollars, For a Few Dollars More, Hang Em High, and of course The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly, which in my opinion has the best theme song and the best ending of almost any western.
Westerns have such great dialogue. You just cannot beat them for quotes. Here are some of my favorites:
Blondie: In this world there's two kinds of people, my friend. Those with loaded guns, and those who dig. You dig.
The Good, the Bad, and the UglyJosey: When I get to
likin' someone, they ain't around long.
Lone
Watie: I notice when you get to
DISlikin' someone they ain't around for long neither!
The Outlaw Josie WalesLone
Watie: I didn't surrender, but they took my horse and made him surrender. They have him pulling a wagon up in Kansas I bet.
The Outlaw Josie WalesTuco: I'm looking for the owner of that horse. He's tall,
blonde, he smokes a cigar, and he's a pig!
The Good, the Bad, and the UglyStranger: Somebody left the door open and the wrong dogs came home.
High Plains DrifterJosey: Are you gonna pull those pistols or whistle Dixie?
The Outlaw Josie WalesDaggett: You just shot an unarmed man!
Munny: He should have armed himself if he's gonna decorate his saloon with my friend
. UnforgivenJeremiah: [Jeremiah and Bear Claw hunt elk] Wind's right, but he'll just run soon as we step out of these trees.
Bear Claw Chris Lapp: Trick to it. Walk out on this side of your horse.
Jeremiah Johnson: What if he sees our feet?
Bear Claw Chris Lapp: Elk don't know how many feet a horse has!
Jeremiah JohnsonBear Claw Chris Lapp: Can you skin Griz?
Jeremiah JohnsonBear Claw Chris Lapp: Watch your top knot.
Jeremiah Johnson: Yep, watch
your'n.
Jeremiah JohnsonCrazy Cora: You know, if we're lost, you can tell me.
Matthew
Quigley: We're lost.
Crazy Cora: I can take bad news. Just tell me straight.
Matthew
Quigley: I don't know where the h___ we are.
Crazy Cora: No sense
takin' time to make it sound better than it is.
Matthew
Quigley: I reckon we're
goin' in circles.
Crazy Cora: Wire things up and I'll see right through. So, just tell me honestly. Are we lost? Matthew
Quigley: Nope. I know exactly where we are.
Crazy Cora: That's good, 'cause, frankly, I was
gettin' a little worried.
Quigley Down UnderAnd now to pay homage to my all-time favorite western, Tombstone:
Ike
Clanton: What is that,
Holliday? Twelve hands in a row? Ain't nobody that lucky.
Doc
Holliday: Why Ike, whatever do you mean? Maybe poker's just not your game. I know! Let's have a spelling contest!
Johnny Ringo: Isn't anyone here man enough to play for blood?
Doc
Holliday: I'm your huckleberry.
Wyatt Earp: All right,
Clanton... you called down the thunder, well now you've got it! You see that? [pulls open his coat, revealing a badge]
Wyatt Earp: It says United States Marshal!
Ike
Clanton: [terrified, pleading] Wyatt, please, I...
Wyatt Earp: [referring to
Stilwell, laying dead] Take a good look at him, Ike... 'cause that's how you're gonna end up! [shoves Ike down roughly with his boot]
Wyatt Earp: The Cowboys are finished, you understand? I see a red sash, I kill the man
wearin' it! [lets Ike up to run for his life]
Wyatt Earp: So run, you cur... RUN! Tell all the other curs the law's
comin'! [shouts]
Wyatt Earp: You tell 'em I'M coming... and hell's coming with me, you hear?... [louder]
Wyatt Earp: Hell's coming with me!
Sherman
McMasters: Where is he? (Referring to Wyatt Earp)
Doc
Holliday: Down by the creek, walking on water.
Billy
Clanton: Why, it's the drunk piano player. You're so drunk, you can't hit
nothin'. In fact, you're probably seeing double. [Billy
Clanton draws a knife]
Doc
Holliday: [takes out a second gun] I have two guns, one for each of ya.
Big Nose Kate: I'm a good woman to you, Doc. Don't I always take care of you? Nobody cares for you like me. I'm a good woman.
Doc
Holliday: It's true, you are a good woman. Then again, you may be the
antichrist.
Wyatt Earp: What makes a man like Ringo, Doc? What makes him do the things he does?
Doc
Holliday: A man like Ringo has got a great big hole, right in the middle of himself. And he can never kill enough, or steal enough, or inflict enough pain to ever fill it.
Wyatt Earp: What does he want?
Doc
Holliday: Revenge.
Wyatt Earp: For what?
Doc
Holliday:
Bein' born.
Wyatt Earp: You gonna do
somethin'? Or are you just gonna stand there and bleed?